18:17
Tuesday 26 February 2013 //

Raining, and my prayers were answered.Today was calm, but my head wasn't. I couldn't get why and what is wrong with me. I turned myself around; there is nothing I would love more than to be able to doodling down those perfect lines of angle that make the ink of my pen feel alive. And i realize. The lines weren't as perfect as i imagine and it doesn't feel alive. 
Yes, there was something missing. 

How truly spectacular would it be to be able to coherently  put my scattered thought swiftly around my mind onto a piece of paper. But the missing part kept disturbing my head. I couldn't described it. There was no emotion. I took a new blank of paper and make a perfect lines of angle. And i created a face. The lips were curved upwards but it wasn't. I keep on. And start delivering the body language to make it to feel actually.. Alive. But still there was no feeling. The happy poses and smiles that i drew ended looking sad. I was searching for it. And 'it' wasn't there. And i feel regretted
What is it now? What is missing now?
(I don't understand)